Raising Confident Kids: Why Teaching Kids to Ask for Help is a Superpower

We all have our unique strengths and weaknesses. Sometimes, we may even find ourselves struggling with tasks that are beyond our abilities. In these moments, it’s okay to reach out and ask for help. I know it’s not always easy. Maybe you’re afraid of being rejected or judged. But trust me, asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It’s a brave and courageous act of self-care that can lead to growth and success. So, next time you’re feeling stuck, don’t be afraid to reach out. You never know who might be there to lend a helping hand and empower you to overcome any challenge. It is also a great way to model this behavior of asking for help within children since they imitate a lot of what we do. 

As parents, caregivers, and child educators we want our children to grow up to be confident and independent individuals who can solve problems on their own. However, like adults, many children sometimes feel embarrassed or ashamed to ask for guidance, because they do not want to seem less capable or incompetent. This is something that they learn from adults which is why it is important to show them that asking for help is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of strength. It takes a lot of strength and determination to want to better yourself and by asking for the guidance you are doing just that! This is why you must model to children that asking for help when you need it is important. 

Why is it important we teach children to ask for of help?

Teaching children to ask for help can have numerous benefits that will serve them in the future.

5 reasons why it is important to ask for help:

1. 1. Develops problem-solving skills – Asking for support allows children to learn problem-solving skills because they first find different ways to find the solution, and when that does not work they ask for help. When they ask for help they learn how to solve the problem with the support of a more knowledgeable other.
   
2. 2. Boosts confidence and self-esteem – When children ask for help and receive it they feel supported and more confident which helps build self-esteem. However, they also build on their self-esteem when seeking assistance because they get to learn how to solve it which will allow them to be confident the next time they have the same problem or a similar one.
   
3. 3. Encourages socialization – Asking for help is a social behavior that promotes interaction with others. Children who ask for help learn to communicate effectively, listen to others, and work collaboratively. This helps them develop social skills that are necessary for building relationships and forming connections with others.
   
4. 4. Builds independence. Although it seems counterintuitive asking for help actually promotes independence. By learning how to seek help, children gain the tools they need to solve problems on their own in the future.
   
5. 5. Promotes a growth mindset. Seeking assistance promotes a growth mindset because it allows children to understand that there is room for growth. They realize that at the moment they may not know how to solve the problem, but it does not mean they are incapable of doing so. When children adopt a growth mindset, they are more likely to take on new challenges and push themselves out of their comfort zones.

This is why as caregivers, it is our responsibility to model and encourage children to ask for guidance when needed. When we do, we are setting them up for a lifetime of success.

How exactly can we encourage children to seek guidance?

You can encourage children to seek guidance by teaching them how to sign “help” from a young age. This simple gesture can allow children to feel more comfortable asking for assistance and can serve as a reminder that it is okay to seek assistance when needed.

4 ways you can use sign language to encourage children to ask for assistance:

1. Teach the sign “help”: Close your fist and make a thumbs up, extend your palm facing up, and hit your fist (with the thumbs up) on your palm up and down. Practice this sign with children until they are comfortable using it.
2. Reinforce the sign regularly: when children use the sign for “help,” be sure to acknowledge it and reinforce the behavior. You can say things like, “Great job asking for help!” or “I’m so proud of you for using the sign.” This positive reinforcement will encourage children to continue using the sign and ask for support when needed.
3. Use the sign in everyday situations: Encourage children to use the sign for “help” in everyday situations, such as when they need assistance opening a jar or reaching something on a high shelf. This will allow them to become more comfortable using the sign and asking for assistance in different situations.
4. Model the behavior: As with any behavior, children learn by watching and imitating others. Model the behavior by using the sign for “help” yourself, and encourage other adults and children to do the same. When children see that asking for guidance is a normal and positive thing, they are more likely to do it themselves.

By using sign language to encourage children to ask for support, we can help them develop important skills like problem-solving, communication, and self-advocacy. It also helps to build their self-esteem and confidence, as they grow to understand that it is okay to ask for a helping hand when necessary. It is not something to feel ashamed about and if we start using the sign “help” before they can even speak they might never have to experience feeling ashamed for doing so.